Query: Insecurity in Open Relationship (TMI/NSFW text)

I've edited the prompt for a few reasons, but here is the spirit of it. I don't generally have internalised shame about being trans. But one situation that makes me feel dysphoric is when my primary partner goes on a date with a cis guy or non-binary AMAB person. I reject bodily essentialism in principle, …

Surgical Inquiry: girth and implants (TMI/NSFW)

I liked the girth I initially had post-op but once the swelling went down so did the girth by about an inch. Am I right that getting an erectile implant will likely get that inch back? I'm sorry, but it's unlikely a penile implant will give you back that inch. The way a penile implant …

Surgical Inquiry: Swimming Post Phallo

Summer's here and I haven't been swimming since phallo, and my dick's quite girthy. What kinds of swimsuits are good for us and how do you get over the whole 'kids are around' thing? If you're swimming, swim trunks. Our dicks float up when we're in the water, there's no real need for support IME. When …

Post-scrotoplasty query: Jock Itch (tmi)

Have you experienced jock itch? If so how did you handling it? I just brought some gold bond body spray. I start all my showers by rinsing all around my nut sac with a handheld shower head, in warmer weather I often have a 2nd "shower" strictly to rinse my junk. And after patting dry …

Inquiry: Does Hormone Therapy Shorten Life Expectancy

Is there any scientific evidence to back up the belief HRT can shorten your life? They used to assume that our experience of T would mirror that of cis men, that's where the notion that our cardiovascular risk rises upon going on T comes from. But those studies on cis men are largely done on …

Inquiry: The Infantalisation of Trans Men

This inquiry took place over IM, and was amidst a larger conversation. So I don't have a neat starting question, but copied and pasted the bit that made me realise this topic, which I've touched on before, deserved its own entry. \The exact "she" referenced below is irrelevant. Like many others, she's a cis woman …

Inquiry: Do You Have Dysphoria

How do you know if you have dysphoria? All I know is that I am very uncomfortable in my own body, I don't like my sex characteristics at all, a lot of the time. I just don't feel right and I feel a discomfort that I cannot quite put my finger on. I feel disconnected, …

High Praise

Are you familiar at all with the writings of Julia Serano? Your tone, overall prose, and positions on important issues such as personal autonomy, all remind me of her work. As an author, or as authors, your blog’s writing strikes me as being what I always imagined a male version of her work in trans …

Surgical Inquiry: medical tattooing

Hey I was wondering if you knew anything about the potential of getting medical tattooing on a finished phalloplasty result? It seems like a good tattoo artist might be able to make it look more detailed. I have my glans tattooed to address the monochromatic issue and it helps give the illusion of greater definition …

Dealing with misgendering at the beginning of hormone therapy

I was asked for tips to deal with misgendering early into hormone therapy. So here are some ideas, in no particular order. Hair cuts Getting or giving myself hair cuts was one of the best self-care I had. If you don't want your hair to be shorter, dying it, or styling it differently may achieve …